kinda n* and v* anniversary is coming..

[sienna]

3 years ago December 26th I had the worst sv or fp I ever had in my life.
It happened FAST and was violent and unstoppable.

I handled it but it made my emet worse. The first couple of years after I
didn't worry so much because of the old lightening striking twice thing.
But now it feels like my grace period is over.

I've been sort of sipping Coke all day - before I was n* and I think that's
probably why I feel off, too much caffeine. But I do feel n* and the
anniversary thing is freaking me out. So I needed to vent.

I can remember every detail of that night, you know? It's like a bad tape
that plays over and over. So far the EMDR hasn't made it go away,
although I've had some calmer times overall.

Also, there are times when I feel absolutely AWFUL - nauseous, achey,
horribly anxious. If I could bet money at these times I would swear I was
sick. And then it passes, like within an hour or 3. So I feel like I can't
trust my own symptoms and body which I hate.

Now is one of those times, although I don't feel as bad as I sometimes
have. I just hope it doesn't come down to full blown anxiety, in which
case I'll have to take a Zofran and an Ativan. And I hate having to do that.

Thanks for listening to my rambling...

Sienna

[gubba]

I know how you feel. I hate wednesdays since I have V*'d on Wednesdays the last 3 times I've V*'d. I don't know why we think this way and it just adds more stress to our already stressful situations, but it is what we do. I wish I could tell you something great, but you know as well as I do that the day and date means nothing in real life...the SV doesn't care when it hits us since it has no calendar. I can say that easily, but each Tuesday night, I remind my husband that Wednesday is "CHUCK DAY" and so I don't like to make too many plans. He laughs and falls asleep and when we get up in the morning, he looks at me, says I look good and he gets ready for work. Oddly enough, my son usually V*'s on Wednesdays and my husband does notice that, but he says it is just a fluke. My husband is very understanding of my EMET thing, well, as understanding as someone can be, but he thinks my Wensday thing is silly.


I feel certain that you will get past the 26th and be fine, but until then, try and relax and know that no one can control when we V*

[sienna]

Thanks, Gubba.

It seems to have passed. I think a lot of us don't eat right, myself included,
which ironically probably makes us nauseous more often.

I'm right there with ya - I'd have a problem with Wednesdays, too!

And of course because the last time for me happened around dinner time,
that's when I start to feel funny. Sigh.

Your husband sounds like a good guy.

[gubba]

He is wonderful and he loves me in spite of this crazy weird life I lead, but he helps keep me knowing that I must live and I do. We have a beautiful son and he also makes me try to keep a solid mind. Thanks for the nice words

[marty518]

I know EXACTLY what you mean!

I v*d on the same week the past two years in a row! And this week is
that week! The first time (my senior year of highschool), I got an SV
and was sick during exams. I only had to v* twice although some other
kids must have had it worse. Our emet skills can control it better, I
think



The second time happened exactly 1 year later in the same week during
exams of my freshman year of college. I was living in the dorms and I
got food poisoning from eating too many greasy crab stuffed mushrooms
at a banquet the night before. This time I had d* all morning so my
stomach was empty, so I only dry h'd once.



Still, I relive the moments over and over again and it makes me feel
MISERABLE! There is not a single day that goes by when I don't think
about it. Sometimes I read stories of people who go for many years
(I've gone 10 years as my longest), and it gives me inspiration.



Anyways, you can take comfort in the fact that you're definitely not
alone and that we can all help each other through these rough periods.
I just keep washing my hands and never touch my food with my
hands to give myself peace of mind. Let's count on breaking tradition
this year and for many years to come and celebrate SV-free
anniversaries for a long long time!

[tanyarn]

I know how you feel.. The last time I threw up was in 1st grade. It was around Easter time and every year it reminds me of the last time I v*. I even remember my 'anniversaries' for when I was sick as a dog and felt like throwing up. I' am a complete wreck every day for fear I will catch something, get sick and *v. I dread every winter especialy now that I have a son because ever since he was born he has gotten a s/v every year. I have caught it from him everytime to but haven't actually v* yet just had d*. I feel like one year I' am just not going to be as lucky. I' am sitting here writing this and I' am getting nervous just thinking about it. I' m to the point where I'd rather not even send my son to daycare the two days that he does attend. That's how he caught that awful rotovirus last year. Every kid in that place got it including the staff. He goes on Thur. and Fridays and I always call every morning and ask if any kids have been v* etc.. I know they think I'm nuts. I'm just waiting for him to fall ill with something soon. I just know its going to happen.


Basically, I know how you feel with what you are feeling. I really wish I could do something to not worry so much about this. I' ve considered hypnosis, drugs, counseling but I ask myself would that stuff really do anything. I would rather me be this way, minus the worry, anxiety and everything thing else this phobia brings. I believe being this way has helped me not vomit in all the years I have not v*. But, sometimes I wish I did not care if a v* or not. I wish I was the type that thought if I get sick I get sick and thought of it as no big deal.