i was sick (not graphic)

[xkissyx]

I experienced my fear first hand yesterday morning, and ever since i have been a mess, its all i can think about.


ive suffered from emetophobia for as long as i can remember, and the last time i was 'ill' was ten years ago, so prior to yesterday i had almost blanked out the times i was ill so i didnt even know why i was so scared of vomiting as i couldnt even remember the last time i was ill.


I had often thought that if i was sick, it would conquer my fear and id realise i was worried over nothing, and even though i would never chose to be sick, i secretly wanted too inside.


Now that i have been sick (through drink the previous night) i can honestly say my fear/phobia whatever you want to call it has gotten worse.


I feel so irrational and i just want the feeling of anxiety when someone says they feel il to gol, or not to run a mile when my little nephew is sick i want to hold him and tell him he will be ok, i want to be able to eat food out without inspecting every part of my dish. I want to survive being sick without wishing i could die so i wouldnt have to be sick.


i want to be 'normal'.

[Jenneh]

aww i know what ur saying. but what is normal? every person has some kinda 'thing' lke we do.


im sorry to hear u were sick. but did it make u feel physically better afterwrds? if it did, try and focus on that and say" im still alive -- and i feel better -- so being sick is not that bad after all"


welcome to our family. i hope that one day u can do all those things u mentioned at the end of ur post.


Jen xxxxxxxx

[Scattycat]

People tell me I should be sick and 'get over it' but the phobia runs a lot deeper than that. If I thought it was a cure I'd have done it long ago (I haven't been sick for over 20 years) I'm sure I'd feel exactley the same as you .</font>