Newfound Emet

[amch512]

Hello all! Let me first say that I am so glad to have found a group of people with the same fears as I! I have lived for the last15 years (I'm 25 now) thinking that I was some sort of freak...the only person in the world who couldn't, wouldn't v****. Just to give some idea of the severity of my emetophobia...I was recently faced with the knowledge that I could have Cancer...fortunately, I have since found out that I do not....but for that week before I heard the good news...I had made the decision to not fight for my life using such methods as chemotherapy, as it would mean having to v****. I realize how horrible irrational this is...and yet...I cannot help it. The reason I am here is because my husband and I are talking about starting a family. I cannot wait to have children! However...I am scared to death of morning sickness. I feel so selfish that such a fear could prevent me from having children. I am looking for any suggestions or maybe just support from other emets in the same situation (pregnant, or thinking about becoming pregnant, or mothers who have been pregnant) and support or advise will be helpful! Thanks in advance!

[barefootanjel]

Hello there,Amch and welcome to the community[img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]


Don't feel so bad about your recent scare,i'm sure many of us here would have come to the same conclusion(myself included unless I could be given a cast iron guarantee against V*!And I have children so really should feel ashamed)so don't worry.


As fortips about pregancy and morning sickness,my best advice is to talk to your mother and female relatives who have had children/been pregnant,also your partners female relatives as this is important too.


My mother never even had nausea with all 4 of her children and neither did I,killer heartburn and piles,yes! but no sickness.My sister recently became pregnant and suffered with it.We couldn't understand it until we found out that her boyfriends mother actually had hyper-emesis(RARE but awful complication of pregnancy) with all her 5 pregnancies....fortunately,my sister isn't emet so handled it quite well.


Mostof us emet mum's didn't suffer with sickness and i'm sure that a lot of the time it's all down to the power of the mind,although a midwife once told me that sickness during pregnancy and childbirth(natural & assisted) depends a lot on how "sicky" the person is.


There is a lot you can do to stave off nausea during pregnancy anyway.I'm sure that the benefit outweighs the downside.I didn't really give V* much thought when I was trying to get pregnant because I wanted a baby so badly and felt that I would deal with it as and when it came.


I hope this helps you a little.You're sure to get plenty of feedback.


Take care.

[mbs730]

I'm
happy for you that you are okay!! My name is Miriam, I am 29 and I have
been an emet for 25 years now (yes since I was 4) I am married with 2
kids. Anyway my husband had a testicular tumor and it was removed and
luckily no spread was detected and didnt have to go on treatment.
However he has to be checked with having a ct scan every 4 months. I am
an emet in the degree of, well I am not agorophobic because of it. I am
not afraid to go to places and not afraid to eat anything either but
whenever I am faced with the possibility of me v'ing, I FREAK out like
today. I was a bit run down and had bad n, but I took gravol and went
to sleep for a few hours and nothing. I go wiggy whenever I feel sick
and I havent v'ed from being sick since I was 13. I have v'ed from
drinking since then but that didnt scare me only because I was too
drunk to care lol. However I am more phobic of others v'ing than I am
of myself v'ing!! I know this sounds incredibly selfish but if
something was detected in one of my husband's 4 month check ups and he
had to go on radiation as a result, I couldnt take care of him!! I
would run out of the house if he was n!! I feel terrible by saying that
also because of your recent scare but... I am just speaking the truth
from my emet heart! I am afraid of how I am going to be when my kids
get sick. I am scared to send them to places. Its terrible. Anyway just
so you know you are far from alone in this. Take care



Miriam

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[youngemet222]

Hello. Welcome to the community.


About the pregnancy thing.... even though morning sickness is somewhat common in non-emets (not all get it, though, as my mother and many other non-emets didn't get sick), I have heard that a lot of emets do not get sick with thier pregnancy. If you want a child badly, try going for it. I know this sounds stupid, but I think you should try to get achild if you really want one because, like I and others have said, most emets do not vomit with pregnancy. But, if you decide you won't have one just becuase of emet, really think it over. NOW....this may sound stupid of me to say this, but if you are really not going to have a child becuase of the chance of morning sickness (which, again, is somewhat uncommon in emets), maybe you could try adopting a baby. You may not want to do that since it wouldn't be your blood relative, but youcould treat it like itwere part of your family. Again....that was stupid of me to say that and I'm sorry I even said anything about adoption. It is up to you.


Lizzy

[sarahx]

Hi there, welcome xxx


I am sorry about ur scare but i am gald everythings ok now.


I am 20, i have a 2 and a half year old daughter, abby. I had bad nausea nearly all the eway through my pregnancy, but i wasnt so bad with emet then so i coped fine. I was never ever sick i just felt neauseas a lot.


I recently had a miscarriage at 9weeks and i had major bad nausea but again i wasnt sick. I drank flat ginger ale and ate mints. I was on anti-nausea meds aswell. It is hard when ur an emet to think about getting pregnant but i really think that most emets wouldnt v*. I even heaved a few times (sorry graphic) but i never felt like i would actually v*. It does depend on the person. There are no guarantees wether you will or wont get nausea during ur pregnancy. But for most that do it is gone by 3months. And believe me every second of nausea u go through is absolutely worth it in the end!! I cant wait to have another baby, but now im scared i will miscarry again... that scares me more than the nausea at the moment!


Sorry this posts a bit long... If you ever want to talk about anything...


[email protected]


Sarah xxx

[izzybee]

hi amch. welcome to IES.


I'm so sorry to hear of your recent cancer scare. That must oof been a stressful time for you. but its great to hear that you are fine. Its amazing to know that you arnt alone or some freek of nature! Its great to be accepted for who you are, and not type cast as someone that has a phobia and is seen as 'weak'


I'm still very young so cant advise you on the pregnancy thing - however there are quite a few parents on this site who I'm sure will give you advice and answer any questions you may have about morning sickness and stuff like that. Most emet mums dont get morning sickness, or if they do its very mild.


I hope to see you posting soon

[Jenneh]

heya, welcome to our family.


i just want to say that i dont think ur selfish at all for being scared of having children cos of this phobia . its not ur fault ur suffering with this, and im glad uv found us so that u realise ur not alone either.


im 17 so hav no children or plans as yet.. but i can imagine what worries u have... good luck with ervyuthing


Jen xxxxx

[amch512]

Thank you to everyone who posted in reply to my message. It is wonderful to know there is a place I can come to openly discuss my fears without being looked down upon. Thank you all very much for your kind words and advice. I am still scared, but do feel a bit better about the whole pregnancy thing. Of course my husband doesn't know how I feel about this, and I'm sure I will need lots of supportwith this when I do get pregnant....I am glad to know that I can find that support right here. Thanks again!

[buttercup]

Hi, welcome to the site. I'm Jackie and I am 23, I just recently found this site myself and it has been a wonderful releif. I also have not told my husband about the fear (I guess he kinda has an idea now, because he saw this site in my internet history, but I don't think he knows it's something serious) and I really wish I could, I think it would help a lot. I have a 2 year old little boy and he is the most wonderful thing in the world. I was not sick during my pregnancy. I pretty much just told myself from the beginning it was mind over matter and I was not going to let this get to me. Besides that, even if I had been very ill and I had a chance to go back and change it I wouldn't, my son is the best thing that ever happened to me, and he has really helped me overcome a lot of my fear because I have to be there for him. I am quite affraid of how I will handle it when he becomes sick, but I try not to dwell on it and just know that somehow with my husband's help and by the grace of God, combined with the knowledge that I would cut my leg off for my son if I had to, so I think I'll make it through when it happens. If you want a baby, go for it!!! You will never regret the decision to have a child, even in the bad times.


As far as your feelings about cancer treatment, I feel the same way. I always said I would never get treatment if I had cancer (now I know I would, for my son), that's nothing to be ashamed of. It's the fear talking not me. I'm glad you turned out okay, though!!