Okay, so I live with my grandparents. Since beginning to understand this phobia better myself (this site has helped, especially), I've been able to tell them about it, and thought I was making good progress with getting them to understand-- especially my grandmother.
Tonight, though, she just mentioned casually, "I'm n*."
And I actually got angry. Like, look-- just HEARING you say something like that is going to cost me several hours of sleep tonight. I'll be jumping at every noise, and blasting my headphones trying to escape possible involvement with v*. But the worst part is, I KNEW she wasn't in any danger of getting s*, she had no reason to put me into Code Orange for a bit of indigestion.
I thought that was so incredibly inconsiderate and just... urgh. Thoughtless, I guess. She KNOWS how I react to s* people, she's witnessed my meltdowns when my grandfather was on medication that made him ALMOST v*, she knows I can't drive with people who are prone to getting travel-s*... so WHY would she say that!?
Well.
I actually told her, later. She burped, and I went en pointe and quivery and demanded if she was okay. She said, "Oh of course. I'm fine now, I don't feel like I need to t*u*. I never did, I'm rarely s* anyways."
And I replied, "Well, then don't tell me."
She laughed.
I said, "No, I mean it. Just don't even mention it. I'm going to be nervous for the rest of the night now, wondering if every sound means DANGERDANGER, even though I know it's not necessary."
*shrug* She said alright, who knows if that'll actually sink in or not... But I felt rather proud of myself for at least saying it, you know?
Bit o' venting along with a question: do you expect a certain level of respect from the people you've told about your major issue with v*? And how have they reacted when you told them about it, or called them out on NOT respecting you?