hi there. i don't know if any of you will remember me...but i still see
some familiar faces out there. i was a more prominent member in late
2004. i was having a lot of problems dealing with the death of my
grandma and this phobia seemed a lot more obvious in my life around
then. as i joined the site, and talked to many of you, i started
feeling SO much better. the panic attacks subsided greatly, and life
was starting to feel "normal" again. eventually, i felt that i was
doing much better, but my new obsession with researching information
and religiously reading other people's stories and worries and concerns
was starting to get in my head. i found myself being more sensitve to
situations, so i thought i'd sorta take some time away from the sight
and try and feel "normal" whatever THAT means.



it's been almost a year and a half since i've been on and i've been
doing fairly well. not cured or anything like that...i still have my
moments...plenty of them. but not enough to REALLY concern me on a
daily basis like before. i just recently moved to hawaii (i'm from
california) and i was terrified that the move would bring on the
constant worry symptoms again since i'm so far away from my family and
friends. i admit i've had more moments of panic and fear of throwing up
recently than i have in the past 5 months, but nothing dramatic.



it wasn't until tonight that i had a real and serious FOR SURE feeling
of throwing up. i haven't felt THAT sure in several months. i felt the
need to visit this site because it made me feel better when i first
found it.



so here i am, stopping by (at 4am might i add as i'm still not feeling
well) to say hello and hopefully i'll be around for a little bit.



bekah