I joined this forum because quite frankly I don't know where else to go when I feel as alone as I do now. I've placed my family in a significant amount of stress throughout the years. I receive a lot of negative attention wherever I go because of this problem. My friends are not very supportive of me and tend to mock my behavior (incessant hand-washing, checkingcertification at restaurants, carrying anti-bacterialsoap everywhere). I'm unemployed. I enrolled in college two times and dropped out both times due to this particular disorder, which governs my life. I still live at home at the age of 24. I marvel atpeople whoare capable of living without a hint of fear gleaming in their eyes. I am envious of those said people.


Now that I've got all of this negativity off my chest. I'll share a few things that are positive. I'm a ballet dancer. I like puppy dogs with little black spots around their eyes. I'm male and have no problem saying puppy dogs but am still uncomfortablewith wearing black tights. I'm attempting to write a screen play for therapeutic reasons with hopes of getting somewhere in the process (ignoring thesubjectemet).I currently signed up to assist the local Special Olympics team. Rachmaninoff's "Prelude in C# Minor" is my favorite composition. Elliott is my favorite rock band. I have to read sentences five times before I understand them; despite this shortcoming I still enjoy reading when I can. Wikipedia.com is my best friend. I don't know where I'm going in life, so I'm throwing myself into the wind. My psychiatrist says I'm a philosopher, yet I barely knowthe nomenclature.


I hope to make new friendsin this forum. I've read posts here from time to time, but I never bothered to join. I've recognized that many of you are very supportive of each other. That's the kind of relationship I want to have with anyone in my life.