Hey friends,

i really need to chat - i feel so muddled and mixed up right now. i feel like im taking a step back with the emet at the moment. perhaps is due to my reduced effexor - who knows. i just feel more 'scared' and keep thinking and focusing on emet more each day. ive started the excessive handwashing and have had more obsessive thoughts about food lately.

I read Lauras post - and usually i can focus on the positive things abt such an experience - but lately i just think omg - id rather die. i cant go on like this - i just want to be NORMAL!!! it cracks me up because on the outside - i am SOOO normal - but my pathetic crap excuse for a brain is so ABNORMAL and ruining my life.

i have just received the phobia and anxiety workbook - so i think im going to work thro that.

i know its horrible - but the thought of being sick is so so scary - and after reading Lauras story - it just makes me think - where does IT all come from.....? does it just keep getting produced so u cant stop....its just awful [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]

ems [img]smileys/smilies_06.gif[/img]