I
have wondered if one day I have the guts to face how it is like to v, I
know I sound like I am out of my mind (and that is because I probably
am lol) I should run to the nearest pharmacy and ask for some syrup of
ipecac. My emet was triggered by an ipecac experience when I was 4 but
now I am wondering if I should do this to face it again. I have been
thinking about this for a long time. I dont know what to do. I am just
frusterated, and maybe if I v (tried making myself gag and nothing,)
but with the ipecac there is no turning back. Anyway maybe if I v again
since I havent v'ed being sober that is since I was 13 (I am 29 now) it
might help me remember how bad it really isnt more clearly (and yeah I
do KNOW its not as bad as we make it out to be) for the next time I
feel like I need to and not panic. I dont know, or am I taking a HUGE
chance by doing this, either its going to help or do more harm. What do
you think?



Miriam

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