Ummmm Ugh....

[sbias]

Well the wife decided to eat some fast food today, she went to work at 8:00 AM, ate about 11, called me at 1 said she felt sick.... So she was leaving at 2, I went and picked her up, and she is complaining of her stomach cramping. The wife is having her monthly visit, or whatever people are calling that thing these days, and he tends to make her stomach upset. Get home about 3, and well...... She got sick... This has happened before... I wanted to test something, so I went in the bathroom with her. I had felt that I was making serious progress, and told her I would be there if she needed me...... I didn't make it 10 seconds. That was nasty, and I felt like I was gonna be sick.


It was strange... I was more disturbed by her being sick, then I was when I got sick. I'm still shaken up about it. No I am not wigging out or anything, it just really threw me for a loop. I'm not disturbed that I may be sick, cause if I get sick... Well you guys know the good old F-U bring it pep talk I give myself, but this was horrible, when I got out of the bathroom, the heart was racing, it was like a super bang attack all come down at me.


Someone and I don't remember whom asked me since I got sick, how I reacted to others being sick, well I think the vote is...... NOT VERY WELL..... In fact I'd say on a happiness scale I am rating a character on Seseme Street, who'sfellow muppetshave been taken to an animal shelter. (Sorry when I get like this the only thing I got is to make light of it.)


The thing that is bothering me the wife came in, a minute ago and asked how I was doing, and I lied to her. I perked up a really good phoney smile, told her a dirty joke, which made her smile, kissed her (UGH UGH UGH UGH UGH UGH), and told her to take some Myidol (I don't know how to spell it... I don't take it but wouldn't it be funny if I did?) and lay down. I lied to my wife....... MAN I HATE THAT.... I know it's not like I went out and commited adultery, or anything. I can't stand lying to my wife. It's just that she is sick, and she will worry about me, and then blame herself for letting me in on her little session.


Should I go in there and tell her the truth? Should I wait till she feels better? Should I not tell her at all, and feel worse than I already do? Just last night she was telling me how great I have been doing, and showered me with gifts, and affection, I was really proud. What would you'all (West Virginia dialect gotta love it) do?

[alliecat]

Hey There, if you feel so horribly about it, go ahead and tell her that you're not okay, but don't make her feel guilty, okay?

[mbs730]

OMG
I give you SO MUCH credit for even being there for her when she was
sick!!! I would have NEVER been able to do that kind of thing! My gosh
kudos to you! If my husband were to be sick I would just run away,
probably out of the house! And YES you should tell her about the phobia
but I agree, wait until she is better. Be sure to even show her this
site or other sites about it and explain it well. People who dont have
the phobia, even if they have other phobias may not be that
compassionate and understanding But hopefully your wife will support
you all the way!



Miriam

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[Jenneh]

sbias...


i think u were wonderfully brave.


you took control of ur emotions, and u stepped into the bathroom as ur wife was doing the deed... you didnt fling ur arms about in a wild panic... so uv defenitely come along a bit, eh?


the fact that ur wife gets sick often on her period, cud be helped... if she went to the doc or smthing.. they can give u a tablet for tat... to stop the cramps. well, not you but uno wot i mean.


as for you lying to ur wife, if u can call it that. i think its counted as a "white lie" meaning, you have done, nothing wrong. you sed what you did, to make her feel better. i think that was a nice thing for you to do, dont beat urself up for lying! maybe 2morro or sumthing u can discuss how u coped with her being sick and stuff... shes nt gnna be angry at you for lyin


i hope ur ok and feeling a bit better.


Jen xxxxxxxxxxx

[sbias]

Oh MBS, my wife is well aware of my phobia.... It's just after last nights praise fest for me to admit that I couldn't take it, and I am not taking away any of the progress I made, I am just upset that I have become comfortable with it, to the point where I could go in the bathroom right now, and be fine, but to see her do it, threw me in to, a severe panic attack, and my emet said "HISTEPHEN REMEMBER ME! I thought we should hang out for a while."


As for the white lie.... I just hate telling a fib to my wife. She held my hand so many nights, and cried so many times over my phobia, she has given me nothing but love and support, stayed at home when the emet would kick in, and I have never lied when one of my attacks would creep on in. Today is the first time, I just don't want her to over react to this, and think I am slipping. It's just I guess I am really fine with doing the act myself now, but seeing or hearing other people do it is still disturbing? Maybe it's just I have trained myself for so long to distance myself from sickness, that it is a defense mech kicking in.


She is asleep now, which is good for me. I am calming myself, but this was a sharp swift attack. So I am not feeling to well, so I think I might hang around and make smart alecy little comments in the forum for an hour or so.


I was looking at the little emoticons and her face kinda resembled this[img]smileys/smilies_11.gif[/img]or maybe it was more like this [img]smileys/smilies_10.gif[/img], ugh i can't get that image out of my head.... (Sorry trying to be goofy to calm myself down.)

[Jenneh]

sbias: say right back to emet: "hey emet... its Stephen... would you like another punch on the face? *smack*"


[img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]


Jen xxxx

[mbs730]

Stephen
you are lucky that she is supportive of you like that! I wish I
had my family members understand me like that. My husband tries but he
gets impatient. Anyway I have to agree with Jen, punch it back in the
face lol with a BIIGGG fist! [img]smileys/smilies_04.gif[/img]



Miriam

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[x hannah x]

Hang on, periods make you v*???? I di not know that! Ah! I'm scared now...

[sbias]

Hannah my wife was stricken with, and I hope I spell this right, endomitriois. Her periods are severe, her work schedule keeps her from getting the surgery to fix the problem. She is a workoholic.

[sbias]

And Jen I am so glad you didn't leave you made me laugh.......Thank you lady, you made me feel better. Plus my son is asking stupid questions, and told me this really corny joke, so I feel a lot better.


My son's really corny joke......


How do you scare bees?


Boo-Bees....


Man that kid is a riot.

[sarahx]

hehe that was funneee lol sorry i love daft jokes lol


Well done for at least attempting to be around while your wife was ill, even tho u didnt cope too well it still can be a positive! Youy just talk to her when shes feeling better and tell her how much it affected her, tell her u kno its not her fault she was ill, but its not ur fault u had a hard time with it either!! You have come such a long way, pls try and take something positive from the experience.


I kno thats in some ways others being sick is worse than myself being sick. But well done anyway


Sarah xxx

[x hannah x]

Oh! I'm sorry that you're wife is ill, but glad that's the only reason she was v*ing. In my panic I forgot to congratulate you, well done!!! And I have another corny joke:

What's red and smells like green paint?
Red paint!

Tee hee! Love that joke... Tell it to your son! And your wife and your co-workers... Spread the joke!

[Eternity]

You tried man, what did ya expect? Not to feel panicked atall?


You do deserve that praise, n youre not being untruthful for hiding your fear, just kind. I dunno why youre beating yourself up over this, at least you had the guts to try. Youll do better next time.

[sbias]

Spoke to the wife, she looked at me, and said "Well your trying to hard to prove that you are better, your not giving yourself any slack."


Ahhhh I hate it when she is right...... Hell a year agoI wouldn't have even went in the room. Just going in the bath room was a big step. You guys/gals are right..... I just didn't want to have a big emet attack.... Oh well I'll try another time when I feel more comfortable. Told the son that joke and he rolled the eyes..... He can't fool me... He liked it...


Stephen

[harmonygirl72]

Don't worry about lying to your wife..I am certain that she understands. It reminded me of a little emet/lying story that I thought I would share....


I was just in the UK for two weeks visiting two fellow emets, one for the first time! They were awesome! But, one of them whom I visited in Wales knows that I get carsick (feel sick, NOT get sick), and while we were driving around the mountainy roads, she asked me about a million times if I was okay! (Now, I know how other people feel when I do that to then!). So, I finally decided to lie! I told her I was fine every time, even though I felt sick a lot!! I told her later that I was lying and she totally understood! Sometimes you gotta do, what you gotta do!


Trying to think of a dumb joke for your son, but not having luck.....I'll keep thinking....


Mary

[confused]

first of all, WOW! congradulations!! I like reading your posts because they inspire me to keep working on getting over this. I especially like your 'F-U bring it' attitude. Although I'm kinda late in throwing in my two cents I think I'll say it anyways, I agree with you about not wanting to lie to your wife. I don't like to lie to my boyfriend, even if it's about something so small. I tell my boyfriend everything, and it brings us closer together. It sounds like after you talked to your wife she understood! Good job on staying in the bathroom for as long as you did maybe next time you'll be able to stay the whole time!!


oh and hannah, yes periods can make you sick, but don't worry about it, because if you haven't been sick from one yet, then it's not going to happen to you.Also, unlike a bug you don't HAVE to be sick, you can avoid it. sodon't be scared!!!


Danielle

[mbs730]

Uggh
my sister in law who I cannot stand, I cant stand her presence and just
cant stand anything about her... well she v's easily (that is not the
reason I cant stand her, she is a horrible horrible person! not to
mention a hypocrite- there are MANY reasons I feel the way I do about
her and if I got into it now, this would become like 50 pages long) and
yeah she v's from periods, she gets migraines a lot and I cant WAIT
until she gets pregnant, she is probably going to have hyperemesis
gravidarum! Lucky me, I'll have to hear about it! See here is the thing
too, my mother absolutely cuts her alllllll kinds of slack, UNDESERVED
slack and here is the thing. She knows about my emet and at times seems
understanding about it- I even showed her some sites about it and said
there was a name for my "strange" phobia but for some reason she enjoys
telling me moments when my SIL has been sick... she KNOWS I dont want
to hear about it... I dont understand it .. its like she must tell me
"oh she was sick last night v'ing and v'ing and v'ing" okay WHY must I
hear this UGGH.. sorry that was a mini vent there



Miriam

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[sbias]

Thats ok you go ahead and vent MBS... [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]You deserve to flow out a little steam. And for you confused I thank you, I am glad you read my posts, and I hope you find your FU bring it, that smacks your emet upside the head.

[mbs730]

Thanks
Stephen, speaking of which I was told that my SIL *might* be pregnant
and IS sick. Long story but if I get a confirmation of those suspicions
I'll definitely let you know. How are things with you and your wife
today?



Miriam

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[jazz]

*round of applause* well done sbias! that's fantastic, but why are you so hung up about it?! You told a white lie, and let's face it, she didn't see through it, but it completely reflects what a brave character you are.
Well done for hanging in there, and supporting your wife. I'm sure she'd still be v.proud of you, even if she knew that it was an ordeal for you.