New Member...Severe..need therapy?

[ahall0714]

Hi! My name is Amanda Hall. I am an 18 year old college freshman. I've been suffering from emetophobia since I was around 11 or 12. I had my gallbladder removed when I was 12, and since then I have IBS, acid reflux, non-ulcer dyspepsia..HORRIBLE. I have since got better, and only feel nauseous maybe twice-three times a week. I also get horrible panic attacks and although doctors have tried to prescribe me something for the panic attacks I think the meds will make me sick! I always feel alert, looking at people in my classes to see if anyone 'looks' sick. I always take a mental 'roll' in class to see who was absent and to make sure to stay away from them. it's on my mind CONSTANTLY! My boyfriend (who i do not live with) has a little 4 year old sister who I make sure I ask if she has been sick/feels sick before I go around her. I hate doing that, because I have always got it in my mind I DO NOT want kids, when deep down I do, but with this phobia I WILL NEVER allow myself to do anything that might jeopardize my 6 year success in NOT throwing up. ::knock on wood:: My heart starts pounding, hot flashes, anxious when I think I might become infected with something. Now please tell me , should I get therapy? Or should I just deal? It seems like my life revolves around this. If my stomach hurts (gas pains, etc.) I think it's appendicitis, ovarian cysts, etc. and think its gonna make me throw up. I have even thought of 'faking' these illnesses to take care of them *surgery for appendix*, etc..but then I might get sick for the anestheisa(sp???) PLEASE HELP..I feel like a loser, but as I read more and more posts, it sounds SO MUCH like me. Thanks.

[crimgoddess]

Hey Amanda


Welcome to the site! As for whether I think you need therapy- I think this is ultimately up to you. It seems like the way you are living right now takes a lot of time and effort- having to look for people who may be sick, doing a mental role call of people who are absent and 'might' be sick- even trying to diagnose every ache and pain. Do you want to live this way? Do you want to feel obligated to interrogate people before hanging out with then, or not be able to have children?


This phobia is 100% treatable- you can get to the point where you don't feel obligated to do all these things, because you no longer fear the act of vomitting. I know that, that would be the route I would choose, because life is too short to let this phobia take up so much time.


*amber*

[sillygirl]

First of all, welcome to the site! I want you to know that you are not a loser. There are tons of people that suffer with this all of the time. You are definitely not alone. Similar to you, my phobia has also led me to having IBS and dyspepsia. To answer your question, yes do go get therapy. You should not have to sit there and suffer thorugh this alone. There are people out there that can help. In my own experience, however, I have learned not to give up if it doesn't work at first. I have seen two different thereapists now. The first one didn't help at all. The second one helped somewhat, but then we hit a roadblock. I am now in search of someone new.


In response to your comment about children, I have to say do not let this phobia force you to miss out on things you want. You can't let it win. I always knew I wanted kids, but I had no idea how I could ever handle the idea of 1) being pregnant and possibly having morning sickness and 2) dealing with them when they are sick. I have gotten much better, though, and am now happily 4 months pregnant (with no morning sickness by the way) and although I know it will be hard when the baby is sick, I know I will make it throughand it is all worth it.


You will find a lot of support on this site. Everyone here is great! Edited by: sillygirl

[SimplyMe]

Welcome to the site! I'm sorry you are having such a hard time right now. I agree that therapy could help you. You are not a loser, your'e just stuck and need help getting "unstuck" no shame in that. This phobia is a control freak and tries to take over your life so anything you can do to combat that and live as you want to is a step in a positive direction! Take care!

[Babydoll]

forgive my ignorance, but what is dyspepsia ?

[ontariogirl]

Amanda, I was just like you. Through the years I have somehow learned how to deal with some situations and I don't worry about vomiting as much as I used to. The feeling is still there but some times it isn't as strong. About the appendicitis, I am like that to this day. I get the pain on my right side and I freak! I look at the calendar and count to the day of my last period, if it is around that time I don't worry about it. I know the panic it is hell.
Welcome to the site!! You are not alone. Although I have had this phobia for 31 years now, I don't think I will be completly over it, it just slows down a bit, I am not freaking out everyday like I was before.
There is hope out there.

[ahall0714]

Thanks so much for everyone's replies..I am trying to get into therapy as we speak..harder than it looks! (referrals and everything) dyspepsia is where your stomach creates too much acid..i believe my stomach has came use to it now and it doesnt bother me as much [img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]thanks again!

[happyteacher]

I know what you are talking about ahall0714!


I had my gallbladder out 8 years ago and I too suffer from IBS because of it. Doesn't it suck?


happyteacher