I am struggling today....

[Kayat14]

Hey, this is my first post and I am hoping to talk to people like me, I don't feel like my husband or family fully understand what this is like sometimes.

So I don't know if I am coming down with something but today I am struggling.... I feel n*, my stomach is doing summersaults, my mouth is dry from anxiety. This has been going on for the last 24 hours now.

I recently endured and continue to, a really stressful time in my personal life. I realise now that I have had emetophobia now for over ten years. Back in 2007 I was really bad, I developed obsessions with foods, lost a tonne of weight. I thought at the time I had some terminal illness and was dying.

Since, my recent stressful time, it has reared it's ugly head again and whilst I am nowhere near as bad as I used to be, I can't seem to get a hold of the anxiety and associated n* and v*.

I am exhausted from fighting it today, I just want to go to bed but fear I will wake up at after 1am as I normally do, panic and set off a full night of n* and possibly v*. I need to be fully rested as I have a 12 hours shift tomorrow (I am a nurse, I know that is brave of me with this sort of thing - would never of even considered my career 10 years ago so I know I have come a long way already!)

I have some propanolol and some migraleve pinks I could take, but I took the migraleve last night, whilst it relieved the n* I was awake most of the night - does anyone else have this or was it a one off? I've also had some Gaviscon as the n* is causing me awful heartburn.

I realise also that my anxiety is causing me to ramble wildly on this post so I am sorry for that.

Is anyone out there in my shoes right now and want to talk? I am hoping we can calm each other.

Thank you for reading. xxx

[pogopig]

I feel for you I really do. It seems cruel that this phobia causes such anxiety - which in turn makes us feel sick - which then increases the anxiety. Sometimes I really don't know if I'm ill or if it's anxiety.

Have you had any help for this phobia? I've had CBT on the NHS and it did help a bit. I'm currently waiting for more, help is available and we shouldn't have to live this way.