Interesting fact about my emet

[mistyeyes]

Well, I am trying to look on the positive side of all that has happened in the past week, and I realized I learned something important about my emet.


I would have thought that knowing my mother had nothing contagious would have made me feel better, but it didn't. In fact,I felt worse. I had to examine why. I figured out that at this point, I would much rather that my mother had a sv than what her problem really was. I would have rather she had something contagious,and, even if I had gotten it as well; for me it would have been better because it would all be over within a few days.


So I realized it's not v*ing itself that frightens me so badly. It's the idea that it will never stop, that there is no control, that it will continue going on forever. It doesn't matter if it's me, or someone else. The idea that something that is going on in their or my body that can't be controlled or ended is where my real terror lies.


I don't know if this will help me in my therapy, but at least it should lead me in the right direction.

[willow2]

Wow!! I think you have a really good point and I think a lot of us here could relate to that. Whenever we think of v* we think of the worst case scenario of it lasting days on end, being horrendously violoent etc etc. I think we are all simply afraid of loosing control and not knowing and how it will stop. You summed it up nicely and think you will definately move on with your therapy after realising this!!