Maybe you could check out the FDA website, maybe it can re-assure you to the safety of meat and the proper preparation of meat. I'm sorry I can't be of more help, I briefly went through what you are going through, and I got over it by using my nose. When I open the meat, I always sniff it before I cook it. If it has gone bad in any way, it will have an odor. Also, if the color doesn't look right, I won't cook it.
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