Update on my mother

[mistyeyes]

As some of you know, my mother had emergency surgery last Friday to have her gall bladder removed. She is still in the hospital, but the doctor said that she is doing VERY WELL considering the condition she was in when she first arrived at the hospital. She was completely dehydrated, plus she has high blood pressure and diabeties. She walked for 10 minutes yesterday, and today they gave her her first solid foods after the surgery, a muffin and some milk and she kept it down fine. The doctor said that she should be home in a couple of days if things continue to go well. She will be getting home healthcare through her regular doctor, as he says she needs someone there to take care of the wound.


I am glad she is doing well, but still very nervous about her coming home. I think I will be able to do some things for her, like bring her a drink or some food, but I KNOW I will not be able to stay near her. I will bring her what she needs, and then run out of the room. My therapist said that is fine, don't make yourself stay near her if the fear is too bad.


Please, wish my mother the best. Thanks a lot, everyone!

[pretty polly]

Hey mistyeyes, glad to hear your mum is doing well...hope she
continues to get better.You can only do what you are capable of...
don't push yourself too far.Does your mum know about your fear?
If so, then I'm sure she will understand. Just knowing you are in the
house incase she needs something will be enough I should think.

Be brave - we are all thinking of you!!

[kate1966]

Misty...i hope that your mom will continue to heal as she is now....I hope that you can find the courage and strength to be there for her...she needs you now...i know your fears...but you have to be able to help her if she needs you. I know it's scary....but i do beleive in all of us there is a strenght that we don't even know we have....I know you can do this. In times of need...God gives us great strenght. Your mom is going to be fine...but she would love your company I am sure....and you know you would want/expect her to be there for you if it were you in this position. Always try to think that your mom won't always be here...and so you need to spend as much time with her as you can. I KNOW this is hard.....b/c when my dad had to have lung cancer removed and i had to go to the hospital and sit with him.....i was a t-total basket case...but somehow i found inside myself the courage to go and be with him.....i was so scared about the whole thing...but i knew he needed me. So, please be there for your mom. I wish you the best of luck with this. I know you can do it!!!!!

[gubba]

Misty...you can do this. I know you think that you can't, but I bet once she gets there and you see that V* is not involved, you will be able to handle this. Your therapist knows you best, but please understand that your mom would be there for you and this is not going to hurt you. I believe that it will make you stronger. She will be fine either way, and healing will be a bit hard since she has diabetes, but she will be fine. Try as much as you can to help and make her feel like you are supportive and that is all you need to do.


i am proud of you for just worrying about caring for her. I can tell that you want to and that is selfless, but this phobia we have does make us think that we are not able to help others. WE CAN!!!

[tayda]

Aww... glad to hear your mum is doing better though. How are you doin'?

[californiagirl]

Very encouraging news!!


Give you mother my best!!

[mistyeyes]

Thanks for your support everyone. I am still very worried. I have been looking up websites about how people are after gall bladder surgery, and it is NOT very encouraging. I know I probably shouldn't read these sites, but I can't seem to help it. My mind will not quit nagging me. I don't know how to make it stop.


I see many, many people saying that they have d* after the surgery that does not improve. I know I can not catch anything from my mother, but the part of my emet that scares me most is NOT me being sick, but seeing other people having to run to the bathroom constantly, especially right after they eat. And I have seen a lot of info on the web where people that have had their gall bladder removed have d* problems every time they eat and they are afraid to go out anywhere because it is that bad.


This is TERRIFYING me! The thought of my mother having to run to the bathroom constantly for the rest of her life. Her NOT BEING IN CONTROL! That's where I am scared.


This is so awful. I don't know what to do.

[babygap5]

Her body will adjust, it just may take time. The d* will be minimized if she avoids fatty foods such as butter, fried foods, rich cakes and cookies. The reason the d* happens is because the gallbladder controlled how much bile was released to help break down the fats she consumed. Without the organ, it's all up to the liver. The liver can't regulate the amount of bile, so what happens, when she eats fatty foods, there is an excessive amount of bile released which causes the d*. I lived through this and eventually got better, and my mother had it to, and she is pretty good now. If she eats something that is to fatty, it doesn't bother her until the next morning, then after she goes a few times, she's fine.

[mistyeyes]

Thanks so much, babygap. That does make me feel a bit better. I need to start thinking that no matter what else, my mom can control what she chooses to eat.


I do have a question, though. How long did it take for the d* in your case to improve. My older brother is getting married in late January, and I was SUPPOSED to be the one to drive my mother and father to the wedding. It's a two hour drive, and if I am in a state of panic because I am worried about my mother having "a problem", there is no way I could drive, nor should I drive, because I would just be putting other people's lives in danger.


Oops! Had to edit your name to say babygap, NOT babydoll. I apologize.Edited by: mistyeyes

[babygap5]

My d* took almost 2-3 months before it got under control, however, that was BEFORE I realized that it all had to do with what I was eating. My surgeon explained to me that it would take several weeks for the body to adjust, but he didn't mention to me to watch the fat content. Several others I spoke with had told me that they were able to eat whatever they wanted and didn't have any negative effects, so that's why I went on as business as usual. It would usually hit me about 30mins to 1 hour after I would eat. Once I controled the amount of fat, I was much better. It also helps to make sure she eats at the same intervals every day. I found that if I let to much time pass in between meals, I would get very gassy and that would trigger a bout of it.


As long as your mom watches what she eats, she should be fine for the wedding in late January. Get her going on the proper diet now, so her body has an easier adjustment to the missing organ. As for the wedding food, no butter, no heavy cheeses, have her stick to steak or baked chicken. You can even request a special meal for her, just explain she has a restricted diet.


I understand your concern for her, but you aren't the one going through it, she's probably scared to. Just pass on these words of wisdom, what doesn't kill us will make us stronger.


I hope she has a speedy recovery, tell her to watch the diet. As for you, be strong for her, I know you can do it. Keep us posted...

[gubba]

I found that the less fat I ate, the better off I was and I was fine after a few days. My Dr. did tell me to limit the fat and when I did I was fine. I did eat TACO BELL one day about 2 weeks after the gallbladder came out and I hate yucky poop, but not runnning to the bathroom D*.


Your mom will be fine. By January, she will be great unless the diabetes plays another role with it.

[kerryrob]

I'm glad to hear that your Mom is doing better, misty.


Try to stay strong for her durring her recovery and feel free to lean on us here while going through all of this.


Also: take comfort in knowing that the symptoms your Mom is, or will be experiencing are not contagious.


kerryrob