A bit of a helping hand needed here !

[tomtom]

[img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]Heylo everyone first of all im now gonna introduce myself [img]smileys/smilies_05.gif[/img] My name is Peter (no its not Tom) and im the "partner" or bf whichever u want to use of Jen (jenneh) sure many of u know her, and well ive come for some advice. [img]smileys/smilies_12.gif[/img]


I wondered if u guys and girls could help me to help her. by giving me things that u no help u in general to cope/deal with the Emetaphobia and the comlications it can cause. Depression, anxiety, attacks etc. and well basically anything u can say that will help me to help her [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]


thanks alot


Peter xxx

[Jenneh]

[img]smileys/smilies_09.gif[/img]


Thank you Peter...


The reason he is enquiring is because i really am not doing well at the moment. Last week i had to make an emergency appointment to see my CPN and had an anxiety attack there and then in the hospital.


Peter tries so hard to see me, to get me out the house e.t.c but i just can't manage it at the moment. When i'm depressed he tries so hard to get me to talk... only i push him away, and shut him out.


I am lucky to have him though. He found this place all by himself and posted his first post without me evn knowing!

[samara's on tv]

Well back in the day when I would have really BAD Panic attacks just from leaving the house my therapist gave me this advice.


She said that I should GO OUT and DO something...whatever...and then reward myself for it...like having a piece of candy or buying something new...as a reward for going out.


It actually has worked for me...it doesn't work ALL the time but I haven't been having panic attacks when I go out...at least not NEARLY as often as I used to. I hope that helps a little!


By the way it was SO nice of your boyfriend to get on this site! He's definately a keeper!


~Monica

[tomtom]

Thank u i'll pass that suggestion on to Jen [img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[meggy]

Hey Tom,


Good on you for getting on here and trying to figure this all out!! It makes such a difference when partners can accept this kind of thing and look for ways to deal with it rather than ignore it. Jen is lucky to have you!!


I'm sad to hear that Jen isn't doing so good at the moment. It does seem like this phobia comes with really bad times, and then not-so-bad times, you just have to roll with it a bit. I had severe depression from a drug reaction last year and I think that depression and emetophobia go hand in hand a bit - it's that feeling like you're out of control and the lie thatnothing is ever going to be okay ever again that can wreck you right up.


I DO know that acknowledging that it is something that is happening to you, rather than an irreversible change in who you are, can really help. It's like if you got chicken pox, you wouldn't think you had become the chicken pox, its just happened to you, well depression/anxiety can be a little bit the same.


Thinking of you Jen, and praying for you!! This might be bad now but we won't let it win in the end. I'm here if you want to chat some more.

[tcsarah]

What a star you are - I don't know many partners that would take the time or initiative to come on a group such as this to ask for advice, I know my fella wouldn't in a million years!I think the main thing is to show her that you are there for her through thick and thin, that you'll listen to her when she needs to talk and will never belittle or dismiss her problems (as some partners can do at times when they get frustrated with us). You seem like such a caring guy, you probably already do all this, so my words haven't been much good, lol.


Jen, if you are reading this, what a wonderful boyfriend you have[img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

[Galadriel]

What a star you are - I don't know many partners that would take the time or initiative to come on a group such as this to ask for advice, I know my fella wouldn't in a million years!I think the main thing is to show her that you are there for her through thick and thin, that you'll listen to her when she needs to talk and will never belittle or dismiss her problems (as some partners can do at times when they get frustrated with us). You seem like such a caring guy, you probably already do all this, so my words haven't been much good, lol.


Jen, if you are reading this, what a wonderful boyfriend you have[img]smileys/smilies_01.gif[/img]

I tend to agree with this. Just stand by her and show her that she is okay and that its going to be okay. Emet is really tough in that another person can give support and comfort, but its hard to break the cycles of anxiety and all that.


I agree too that its great that you care about her to come on here, most don't enough.


Jenneh, I hope things go better for you, hang in there!

[bexcelica]

what an awesome boyfriend you are.. i think if you keep up whatever youre doing, youll be helping. just be there for her.