The baby issue

[meggy]

Hey, everyone,


This is a plea for help/information/general reassurance from anyone who will give it!!


I'm heaps excited, but also a little scared. My hubby and I have decided to start a family within the next couple of months (gulp!). We both really want kids, but of course, I am fighting those stupid little dragons of fear ("What if I get sick, what if I get so sick I want to die, What if I have to have some horrible medical procedure that means anasthetic = v*= all round terror, what if...???aghh!!) you know the ones. Well, I had THAT doctor's appointment the other day, where they do all the checkups and give you vitamins etc. So I'm all okay on the technical front. However, I was hoping that you guys could help me out on the emet front!!


Is anyone else here preggers, or looking to get that way, or has been in the past who can give me any tips?? Or who wants to freak me right out with a scary story??!! Just Kidding!! Anyone who has an opinion on this one, feel free to speak up!! I already read some posts on this topic, but the more the merrier!!


Also, anyone who knows the Aussie medical system (like what drugs they use in Australia, or how they treat emet, anything) I'd love to hear from you!


Thanks, guys!


Meg

[bexcelica]

i have never been pregnant, as i am only 21. but, i think that once you
get pregnant, itll all be worth it. even if pregnancy is hell, once you
have that baby and look into his or her eyes, itll be worth it.



im afraid to have kids for the same reasons you are... i think that
once you do it, youll feel completely differently. i mean that if you
do get sick, youll know its because you have a baby inside you, not
because you ate bad food or caught a sv*. also, many women dont get
morning sickness at all. its pretty much said that you wont feel good
at some point, but it may only be to the point of a little gas

[sillygirl]

I am in the same situation as you. I got off birth control a few months ago and this is the first month my husband and I have actually been trying. For all I know I am pregnant now. I guess I have just decided not to let emet control my life anymore. I still have tough times, but when it comes to the baby issue I just keep reminding myself that I really want a baby and that it is not worth giving up for emet. I am really hoping to get through without morning sickness and all, but I guess if I get it, I get it. I don't have much advice other than that. It's kind of just something you have to convince yourself you want to do.


Well, congratulations on making that step! Good luck! We can get through this together!

[meggy]

Geez, I hope so!!


And I would put up with 9 months of gas if it meant I didn't have to feel sick!!


has anyone else ever thought it's way dumb how you usually get sick early on in pregnancy, not later when the baby is taking up all your stomach room? I remember being scared of pregnant chicks when I was little, cos I knew that pregnant meant morning sickness! I didn't go near my mum for weeks when she was having my sis!! LOL :O)

[meggy]

thanks, sillygirl - I'm right with you on that one.


Good luck to you, too! Keep us posted if you have any news... :O)

[want2live]

I'm in the same boat - only - this will be my second one. I have a beautiful

3 and a half year old daughter. Now we're thinking about a second.

I was absolutely petrified. And still am. They say that every pregnancy is

different - I was extremely lucky with my first. I was nauseus <(spelling?)

I was weak and very fatigued but not once v**!! Who knows what will happen

the next time - but I'm going to bite the bullet because I know, as you will too,

that once you see your baby and fall madly in love - whatever you had to go

through to have it - it's so worth it!!

I would also like to add that when you feel sick with morning sickness (I don't

know why they call it that because it's morning, noon and night sickness)

it is different than the anxious v** sick you feel with the phobia. Maybe it's

horomones or something - but it doesn't feel the same - I can't explain it -

but you're just more calm. I guess emotionally you surrender your fears

TEMPERARALLY - until after you have the baby. I don't know. Does anyone

else have any thoughts on this? I don't understand it myself.



I guess what I'm saying is that if you really want a child - it's so worth the risk.

Hope that helps,



want2live




Edited by: want2live

[jesskali]

We have been trying to get pregnant for a year now and was just diagnosed with male factor infertility. There is very little hope of us ever having our own child. We are currently seeing a specialist and are undergoing genetic and chromosomal testing.

Trust me, going through all of this, makes emet a very minor problem indeed.

Jess

[suzy.o]

I diddt go for a pregnancy test till after the 3 month sickness zone was away. I diddnt puke as I diddnt have the definate knowledge that I was preggers from the doctor. I do know that my maternal instinct overtook the fear of being sick. It proves then that its all in our minds and that mother nature is much more stonger than our phobia.Edited by: suzy.o

[donna1216]

I just had my 3rd baby--I didn't v**** a single time!!! I think part of it is genetic--talk to your mom and her mom--hopefully that is an encouragement!! A lot of it is keeping your stomach from becoming empty. There were only a few times in my 30 months of being pregnant that I actually thought that I COULD possibly be sick, once was when I skipped breakfast (had to work) and then lunch was taking too long, and when I drank caffeine with my 2nd. There are lots of moms on here who have been through it multiple times as well and never v'ed, either!! The babies are so worth it, even if you DO v*****--I would have v'ed to have my babies!!! The love you will feel overcomes the fear, trust me!

[samara's on tv]

I've never been pregnant, nor do I want to be. I don't want to have kids, and I have very legitimate reasons for it. But anyway, I think that if I did want a kid it would be completely worth it to go through morning sickness. I talked to my mom (She's had two kids...I'm the adopted one) Anyway she never got morning sickness...she also didn't V* during birth. I think that you will love the fact that you are pregnant so much that you'll forget all about morning sickness, a baby is totally worth it!


~Monica

[japa]

Off topic but


samara - I think that any reason someone gives not to have kids is a legitimate one because it's such an important decision that no reasons can just simply be discounted.

[trixie]

I have had 4 children. First 2 boys and then 2 girls. With my boys i felt nauseous, but never actually v* with my girls i was v* from 6 weeks until about 15 weeks. I was hospitalised with my youngest as i really couldn't keep anything down. When my first daughter was born and diagnosed as having Down's syndrome i remember crying to a midwife saying 'but i had all that morning sickness' When i was pregnant with my youngest i decided right there and then i would never have any more because of the sickness and now when i get broody i think of those horrible days. However, it is a different type of v* there is no panic associated with it and it is just there. I found it a lot easier to v* with pregnancy as it was hormonal. In the end i had to put stemetil suppositrys (Spelling??) up my bum as i couldn't take anything orally and these were supposed to make me feel better. They didn't and in the end i just put up with it. After 12 weeks things started to get better and after 16 weeks it had stopped. All the time i felt sick though i kept thinking of this little baby inside me and it kept me going. I found reading baby books a real help because it made me feel as though i was 'there'. I went down to 8 stone (i am normally a big girl) i was like a skeleton wrapped in skin and i burnt my osophegus from constant v* but i still don't recall being afraid of v*. Yes it was a bloody nuisance, but there was not fear associated with it. Now i have 4 beautful children aged 14, 11, 7 and 5 and if i had to go through it all again for them i would. I wouldn't want another baby mind you, but if i had to go back in time to relive my pregnancy's again - i would. I had some of the happiest moments of my life when i was pregnant. I felt radiant and happy - at peace with the world and the feeling of being an expectant mum was out of this world. I loved all that. And, when i gave birth and held each little bundle of joy, it had been worth it. I absolutely hate it when they are sick. Fortunately mine don't get sick often and i put this down to healthy eating - onions, garlic etc., but when they are it is usually short lived. My husband is good though and helps me where i can. I just go through the rubber glove, dettol process and try (although it is hard) to keep them away from each other!! and to keep seperate cups etc., All cups etc., have to be sterilised in bleach after they have been used. My eldest was sick 3 years ago and afterwards he took a drink out if this cola glass i have. Although i sterilised it, i can't use it and whenever i go to the cupcoard to get a glass i never choose that one!This emet can be a funny thing, but also a very very sad thing.


Good luck to you all and remember having a baby is the most beautiful, natural thing in the world. Love Trixiex x

[donna1216]

I agree--it is the most WONDEFUL experience--the only thing I hate about being pregnant is the BACK PAIN!!!!! Forget tummy troubles! Pregnancy & childbirth is truly a miracle and no matter how old your kids get, they will be the most wonderful thing you have ever done in your life, and you will not regret a minute of it--even the morning sickness!!![img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]

[zane2673]

HI, Congradulations and Good Luck!! I have two children. I didn'tv* once. I had occassional mild nausea in the beginning but made my way through okay. I took my prenatal vitamins when I went to bed at night because a lot of people told me they felt sick after taking them. I was fine through both delivery's and never felt like I was going to be sick either time. The heartburn was a killer but I had tums wildberry flavor with me everywhere I went just in case. If something turns your stomach don't even try to eat it when your pregnant even if it was absolutely something you loved prior to being preggers. My cousin is a big spaghetti sauce lover and with both her pregnancys any time she ate anything made with tomatoes she immediately got sick all the way up until she actually had her baby.


Good luck and I'm sure you'll be just fine!!

[jzm9vs]

I've had 3 kids and though I felt nauseas with two of them, never got sick. You'll do just fine! Do yourself a favor though - and use the net to research NATURAL ways to prevent it... ginger, etc. (You've probably done this already!) :-)


Just keep crackers and soda water or carbonation handy at all times. Those were total life-savers.


Again -You'll do great and every second if a million times over worth it.

[suzy.o]

Also the doctor can give a drug called maxolon,(metoclopromide) Its safe to take in pregnancy and used by chemo patients and people with digestive disorders. It dulls the v*ing centre of your brain which is (Ithink) situated at the base of your skull at the back of your neck, the drug also stimulates your digestive system and gets your stomach to work in the way it should. I took these a few times, Ialso had the consolation of knowing they were there if I needed them. Stemetol,is a drug that helps with vertigo and also dulls the v*ing centre of your brain, However this drug makes you drowsy,and doesnt work onyour digestive system at the same timeso be careful.I have two children and and both pregnancies were fine. Edited by: suzy.o

[donna1216]

In the US that drug is called Reglan--i took it to increase my milk supply when I was nursing Haley

[meercat]

I am so proud of you mothers, soon-to-be mothers, and baby planners!!! I wish so much to be like all of you. My phobia has me so scared of having children, that i just couldn't fathom it. Fearing morning sickness and the fact that small children "V" quite frequently, scares me to death! I will be 38 in December and i feel that children will never be a part of my life. I have an even deeper issue about this because i am a practicing Catholic and in order to even get MARRIED in the Catholic church, you have to be open to children, meaning NO use of artificial birth control what-so-ever...that would be possibly preventing a child that God may have wanted you to have. Now i'm NOT looking for religious debate on this, but my faith is everything to me...enough that i will actually not marry (due to my aversion to having children) at least until i'm through menopause...it's a real struggle for me as i've always wanted to be married and live a normal life..but (sigh) sometimes what "we" want, is not what "He" wants.

I wish all of you the BEST of luck! Your strength and courage is very uplifting to me!! God bless you!!

Meercat :-)

[sheri-baby]

This phobia is so horrible, I can't believe someone would not want a child because of illnesses they will have, I have 2 kids 8 and 5 and 24/7 I am filled with worry and dread that an sv will strike, often I wish I never had kids, how sad is that!!! I love my children too death, they are my life, my babies, I just hope that love you can have in your life will not be stopped by this phobia...we are stronger than this emet crap....we can beat it!

[matmysunshine]

I can relate, I have 1 bueatiful little boy, and the ironic thing is that I was not fearfull of me Ving prior to or during my pregnancy... I did not like it to be around it, and I was not happy if I felt ill, but was it not a fear that haunted me daily.. Sometime after my son was born, maybe when he was 6 months, my Husband felt ill, and I remember I watched him and questioned him all night, this is when this Annoying fear started.. Now we want another baby and I am a FREAK with Fear.. I guess I am just trying to understand were and how my fear just came out of the wall u can say over night, in one day... But good luck to the trying mommies.. I am sure we can come to each other for support

[mommyof3]

I just wanted to add that I have three children, one born C-section under GENERAL anesthesia and I did not v* during my pregnancies or deliveries. They are 7, 5, and 3 now and have had their share of sv*s, and although I have caught them, I never actually v*, just, um, had problems with the other end. LOL. And even right now, at the height of anxiety (one v* twice this morning), I don't doubt my decision to become a mother. I admit, when the first one v* for the first time, I freaked, but over the years I have come to accept that this is going to happen and I just deal. Bizarrely, according to my husband, but I deal

[sheri-baby]

mommy of3, i envy you soooo much!i wish i could have that same attitude as you when my kids get sick, that would make me such a happier and relaxed mom. keep up the positive attitude! Take care

[meggy]

Wow!! Thanks so much all of you for your posts - you are so encouraging!! I am totally excited about taking this step, and feeling really good about it all - even to the point where I think I'll cope just fine even if I do get a little sick. I will just arm myself with lots of natural remedies and take it one day at a time. The hardest part may well be explaining to a room full of twelve year olds (my students) why I am carrying handfuls of crackers and soda water around the classroom, and why I smell like ginger- LOL!! It would be nice to keep a pregnancy secret from them for a while, but they are pretty sharp... they will probably sniff it out in no time!


Thanks to all the mummies for your tips, tricks and confidence boosts!! You guys are the best :O) Keep 'em coming!


Now I just have toget pregnant... hmmm... ;O)

[rachel_81]

My husband and I are also trying for a baby, think my
broody feeling has overidden the fear of sick at the moment. Have
fun trying[img]smileys/smilies_02.gif[/img]</font>